As I sat in my car driving to my destination, I felt like I was getting nowhere with my emotions. I was on auto pilot with the car, as I was going to a familiar place, but I felt as if I had lost all control of what I was feeling. My heart was swerving all over the place, changing from one thought to another. I couldn’t get my words out. I couldn’t keep my words in. I was rambling. I was crying. I was repeating myself. I was a mess. I was alone.

And suddenly it hit me. The most important person, the one who truly understood me, the one who takes my mess without judgment, was who I was already in communication with! I was praying. I had started out praying. I had been carried away with all i was experiencing in the moment, that as I prayed and felt out of control, I had lost all sense that this raw time was still a time of prayer. Till God whispered. He was listening all the time. I was not alone.

I was trying to figure out who I could call and who I could talk to. Who could carry my burden for me or with me? My burden was so heavy.

In our times of need and desperation, we often go looking for our friends and the friend that sticks closer than a brother is already present. Immanuel, “God with us”, has never left. We need our friends and yes, God puts people in our lives, but we need God first and more.

Sometimes we feel embarrassed that we don’t know how to express ourselves to God or that our up and down emotions offend Him. And then He whispers again, that the Holy Spirit intercede and interprets.

There are times we feel that we just have to share. We have to tell someone. I was trying to figure out who I could call and who I could talk to. Who could carry my burden for me or with me? My burden was so heavy. And once more, God whispers, ‘Cast your cares on me. I am your burden bearer’.

No matter what – how we feel or what we say, God is aware. God accepts. God is already, at that moment, attending to our need. There is nowhere else that we need to go. We don’t have to be cleaned up and have it all together to present ourselves. God already knows and is always in control.

My drive may have taken me a different route than I expected that day, but I arrived safely into God’s arms and to my physical destination.