As I looked at the text my son sent me, my heart began to pound. Anxiety began to try to make its home in my heart but I knew I could not welcome it, so I began to pray. The prayer was constant and I felt like anxiety had knocked on my door and was pushing it hard to force himself in and now I was left standing and pushing back to keep the door from being broken into.
The text was a message to let me know that my son’s school was on lockdown and he was under a chair in a locked room as somewhere in the school there was a police chase after students who were suspected of having weapons.
That is one thing I do when there is trouble, when I don’t know what to do, when there isn’t anything else that can be done.
I did not send my son to school for this. God, I can’t be there to comfort him or to protect him. God help me. God help him. My mind was racing. In those moments God used my son to encourage me. He wrote “mom I am o.k. I am praying and listening to worship music so I am not anxious!” What?!
Thank you, God, that as I follow you, my life is an example. Thank you that as I practise disciplines that grow my faith, my children are learning and growing in theirs. Thank you, God, that my children are learning what it means to trust you. Thank you, God, that you are with them, that you are where I can’t be, that they are never alone.
The lockdown lasted 2 hours. I thought I would pick him up and all would be over but the drive to get him only got more complicated. There were police cars everywhere. There were detours. There was trouble not only in the school that day but outside. There was an actual shooting in the community at the same time as the lockdown in the school. I saw the car with the bullet holes! It took me such a long time to get to my son and I just wanted him out of the area. I wanted him safe. Isn’t that all we ever want? We just want to protect our children from everything. It is a crazy world out there. But we can’t keep them from every danger.
As life would show me in this one instant- we go from one danger to another. God takes us through the detours, through the dangers, through the known, through the unknown to places of safety and places of celebration. Through it all we learn to trust in Jesus. I had so many people praying. That is one thing I do when there is trouble, when I don’t know what to do, when there isn’t anything else that can be done. All our prayers together brought Jesus close. That is who I needed in this time. Jesus was close to me. Jesus was close to my son. Jesus was close to the situation. Jesus is who we all needed.
Philippians 4:4b-7…The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.